Why is Modi bent on increasing life expectancy, when population explosion is at its peak?

In a big blow to the BJP Government, a team of eminent demographic experts from around the globe recently tagged India as the most populated country in the world. The report revealed shocking correlations between census figures and the current Prime Minister Narendra Modi, openly blaming him for the stark surge in population.

Our correspondent reached out to one of the experts, who entirely exposed Modi’s politics.
“See Modi started Swacch Bharat Abhiyan, as a result of which people stopped littering and the mosquito population in cities has drastically dropped. With fewer mosquitoes, it is becoming difficult for people to get ill and die early.”

As soon as the news broke, keeping the interests of mosquitoes in mind, a case against Modi was filed in the Supreme Court by PETA. Some are even equating the wipeout of mosquitoes to the ethnic-cleansing carried out in Gujarat in 2002.

Many prominent journos have written scathing op-eds to attack Modi after his recent Independence Day speech where he mercilessly promised to extend healthcare benefits to 50crore Indians. Most questioned Modi on the need for such dramatic expenses on healthcare for the poor, blaming him for keeping the poor and the poverty alive in India.

Despite their past reputation, if election pundits are to be believed, then the present Government is cunningly conspiring to increase the population with an intent to eventually expand their voter base.

After the report was released, opposition leaders created a ruckus in the Parliament.

“The BJP Government, led by Narendra Modi, has only tried to distract people from real issues by endlessly lining up health initiatives like Mission Indhradhanush, Ayushman Bharat, and Modicare. BJP is trying every dirty trick in the book to improve the fitness level of people. They are trying to polarise people on the basis of their body mass index, by peddling the fake narrative that exercising and eating healthy will increase life expectancy. If this was true, then why do sportsmen in our country eventually die?” said a prominent opposition leader, unwilling to disclose his name, weight or body mass index.

The recent reduction in the price of cardiac stents has further added years to the lives of middle and old aged people, who are nothing but extra mouths to feed. Since coming to power Modi has increased the nation’s burden, and voters have no option but to vote Congress into the power so that the events of Direct Action Day can be repeated.

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